It’s amazing (and scary) how much the words of others can either build us up or destroy us. Why is it that the hurtful words that tear us down outweigh those that lift us up? Why can’t we just focus on the good instead of the bad? That’s been my struggle this week.
As a blogger, we write and share about our life with the hopes that someone will read our words and that it will positively impact them, even if in a small way. So we write and write with hope but without really knowing (unless we are told of course). So, when someone takes the time to tell you how you have made a difference and that what you are doing matters, it makes your day. It really builds you up and adds a pep in your step.
Last Sunday, a friend of mine at church did just that for me. She was full of nice and encouraging words that really built me up as a person and made me feel important as a blogger in my community. I walked away encouraged and with a sense of pride in my work as a blogger.
Once we got in the car I was telling my hubby about what she had said and how much her kind words had meant to me (more than she’ll ever know). I really felt great!
Later that same day, a someone else expressed quite the opposite sentiment. He basically told me that he didn’t care about my blogging, my successes and my experiences and just like that, the “great” feeling was gone. Guess I don’t have to worry about him reading this post…LOL.
Back in the car and later that same night (and unfortunately over the next couple of days) I kept telling my husband how hurt I was by that persons words. My hubby kept reminding me of the words my friend had told me. Then he said something that made me stop and think. He said “why have you spent more time talking about (and focusing on) the hurtful words instead of the words of encouragement?” and you know what he was right (don’t tell him I said that).
Why would I let the hurtful words fill my head and heart, basically consuming me? Why did I give those hurtful words so much power? Why couldn’t I focus on the encouraging words my wonderful friend had told me? I’ll be honest, I still don’t know why! But enough is enough.
Every time those negative words pop in my head, I won’t add fuel to the fire by discussing it or paying attention to it. I won’t give those words any more power. I know it’s not going to be easy but it worth a shot.
Are you struggling with hurtful words that you just can’t shake? If so, I am sorry someone has hurt you. You are not alone. Please don’t give them the power to destroy you, you are better than that and so am I.
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Leanette Fernandez is a happily married Latina who is a proud mom to 2 beautiful children and 1 fur baby (a goldendoodle named Finn), who loves living in beautiful South Florida (Miami/Ft. Lauderdale)! A graduate of the University of Miami with a Bachelor’s Degree in Psychology and Education, she started blogging back in 2010. Leanette is all about living her best life and encouraging others to find the fun in everything we do.
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Just Do It
7 years ago
I know just what you mean! I honestly can’t shake hurtful words that were said to me when I was a small child. If a stranger or someone you care nothing about says something mean…its easy to let it go but if someone you admire,look up to or just really care about says something hurtful…it really haunts you. Not a good feeling. Thanks for sharing.
It’s hard but it gets easier (or at least I hope so)…thanks for commenting!
I know what you mean. We often dwell on the negative and don’t enjoy the positive as much. I am one of those really sensitive people and words really do hurt me and get to my core. THat is something I am working on. I don’t want other’s words and opinions to rule me and make me feel down.
I hope that you can work to ignore those negatives and really enjoy the positive.
It’s a process but I am definitely trying not to let them bring me down anymore.